My level of frustration hit a new high last night…I officially had my first meltdown due to the house and TTC.
My life has been so incredibly hectic lately, I barely feel like I am coming and going in all directions pretty much round the clock. I have a really insane workload at school, private tutoring with lots of work going on everyday, basically another full time job with the mortgage process, then to get the news from the doctor on Monday – I just couldn’t handle anymore…then my mother decided to lay a guilt trip on me.
REALLY??? Right now???
I don’t have any energy to tip toe through someone else’s ego. I realize that she needs help and that she wants me to be there for her, but what she wants I cannot provide right now. I have tried to include her in the things with the house, but that doesn’t seem to matter whatsoever. I am busy – scheduled long hours many of the days of the week with tutoring and my work, plus the work with the mortgage and trying to fit in some fun with friends to keep me from being a huge pain in the butt. She gives me no notice when she wants me to do things with her and it doesn’t seem to matter at all.
I broke down and cried for about 20 minutes straight. I begged Aaron to talk to the mortgage people today instead of me because I needed a break so badly. He is going to work on his lunch break and right after he gets done with work to see what needs to be done. I just need a day.
The medicine that the doctor put me is making me kind of crazy. I had taken it before and it took me about 2 weeks to get adjusted to it. It makes me tired and I have a constant upset stomach – so that is not helping how I feel right now. I know that it will get better and I know it’s for the best possible cause. Aaron is having a hard time with me being under the weather with the meds because he hates to see me not feeling well at all. He wants to help so he gets me Tums and rubs my back when my stress levels hit a high point.
I will be so grateful when it is April 9th, at the closing and being handed the keys to our home. I cannot wait!!